“Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.” Ephesians 3:17-19

Last month I was at a conference through my church and was talking to one of the ladies who spoke after a session. We were talking about God’s love and trials and things that He allows us to go through. I shared how I struggle with understanding why God allows some of the trials I go through into my life. And that struggle with understanding why He allows some painful events have lead to me having a difficult time trusting Him. Especially being vulnerable enough as a helpless baby or child with Him. I had been wrestling about seeing myself as a child of God and how that made me ultimately not in control and helpless. Which in wrestling through that would bring me back to hurt and pain and ultimately not trusting God.

She made a statement that made me think of the above verse in a completely different context. She talked about how we love to talk about how high or how wide God’s love is, but we don’t like to talk about how deep it is. Because finding His love in the deep is dark and messy. Finding His love in the deep is painful.

I think it is in our nature to resist pain. We don’t like to feel hurt and pain because we weren’t created to be okay with that. Hurt and pain are a result of sin in the world so it makes sense we would do whatever to avoid pain. I know for me I’m always trying to be in control of things as to try to avoid pain. I don’t willing step into situations or conversations where there will most likely be hurt. I avoid the heck out of them. And while God doesn’t want us to be careless or wallow in our depression. He is faithful to meet us in the deep/pain.

Part of His working all things for good (Romans 8:28) is in finding out how deep His love is. I had a friend ask what is hope? I’ve been pondering that a lot. Especially recently as I’ve found myself struggling with depression and feeling tired from a lot of anxiousness. I think hope is finding God’s love in the deep. And that hope gives us the boost we often need to eventually make our way out of the deep. Finding out how deep God’s love shows us the depth of His grace too. He wouldn’t condemn us in the darkness/deep, but instead pour His love on us, therefore showing His grace.

When we are finding out how deep His love is, it is because either we have made a mess of our lives by bad decisions or we are going through completely heartbreaking pain or tragedy. Neither are places we want to be in. Neither are places we are thankful for. It is no secret that I like so many people today struggle with depression. The beauty in finding God’s love in the deep is that you find His love! And His love is what brings us hope. His love is what brings us peace. His love brings us true joy. And we are brought into a closer relationship with Him. This shows God’s promise that He does not waste anything, even the deep places. His whole motive is to shepherd our hearts into a closer relationship with Him. He is jealous for our love.

He wants us to experience the incredible closeness and blessing that is found when we find out how deep His love is. And while His heart breaks when we go through that pain, in His goodness He allows it so that we can find just how incredibly deep His love truly is.