Sorting it all Out (Poem)

Is it just me

Sitting here waiting for the plot twist

Waiting for the shoe to drop

Because life is too perfect

To good to be mine

Misery and pain are what I’m used to

Everything falling to pieces is the life I know

Smiles and laughter never stay in my life

Waiting for those I love to fade to ash

It’s like they may not be after me to take me back

But they destroyed everything else in my life

What happens when the secret escapes

What happens when what’s under cover comes out

What happens when all that was clandestine is known

What happens when the unknown no longer keeps me in fear

Will that be when I loose the life I want

Will that be when all I’ve made my life to be will be left for dead

But secrets are out

My soul is released

And I fear it’s not long until the rest follows

For there is a healing and freeing

A battle in the air

For they’ve kept me cowering in fear and silence for way too long

And with my voice

A strength has been released

But you wrap yourself around my heart

You worm your way into my head

And you trying to convince me I’m not free

Try to convince me I’m still yours

But there is a fight in me

And I will be free

Even if in battle I breathe my last

For truth is stronger

And it screams from the depth of my soul

And the secrets and lies you wrote for me

I will burn them all damn down

For my soul is gasping with the sight of hope

That for once all my secrets will be out

And truth will be known

And I will be healed

I’m determined

Even if it means I loose it all

Because a life like mine doesn’t just change over night

What was born broken

Doesn’t just become whole

And it would be naive for me to think anything less

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